Be thou humble and the Lord thy God shall lead thee by the hand, and give thee answer to all thy prayers. D&C 112:10I've written my thoughts on grief and the first steps in a twelve step program in terms of trust in God. In a very real way, they are issues of trust, not merely belief.
In many ways, the third step completes the rift between grief recovery and a twelve-step program. In a twelve-step program, people recognize that life has gone out of control because of things they have done and are doing and that the solution is to let God decide (the famous "I can't, God can, Guess I'll let God" mantra). In grief it is easy to see life being out of control because of the pain caused by things God has allowed to happen.
Alcoholics usually have a trail of jobs lost, lies told, relationships ruined because of the choice to drink and the loss of agency about whether or not to drink. Their own will has led them into the abyss and a twelve-step program offers them a path to let God's will rule their lives and lead them out and into sanity.
But many in grief were earnestly seeking God's will. C. S. Lewis wrote of the death of his wife in that context. Dallin H. Oaks had a similar experience when he came to be a widower. In the death of a child, consider David O McKay's son dying soon after he was called to full time service to God.
In this context, it requires seeking God's will in spite of God's will already having taken one through soul wrenching pain, sometimes more than once. Job's words, how he would trust God, even if God were to slay him, sit in that context. It is the challenge to trust God even though he may do the same thing again, a far different call for trust than a twelve-step program usually calls for. In fact, a common source of humor in twelve-step literature (consider the Joe & Charlie tapes, available free on the web, which contain a good example of this) is the baseless fears that following God would involve any pain.
No one in AA expects life to get worse in the will of God. In grief, it is very possible God has worse in store than one has already faced.
Yet, whether we turn to God, or whether we are holding to God in spite of everything, the key remains to trust in God. If we can do that, in humility, God will take us by the hand and give us answer to our prayers.
May the Holy One answer your prayers.