Sunday, February 19, 2006

I knew that by using food to submerge and deal with emotion that I was hiding emotion, and that when I quit "eating my feelings" that emotions would emerge, and they have. The biggest surprise to me about my life without food as a buffer is that the emotion that was hiding the most was how happy I am with the people in my life, especially my wife and children.



When we were first married I was so overjoyed by how marriage was even better than I dreamed possible that I had to tell someone, so I would talk to my wife while she was asleep, telling her just how wonderful she was. She learned to just go back to sleep if she heard me talking at night. I still do that some times. It has always been so good just to have her there.

8 comments:

Susan M said...

Congratulations! How exciting for her.

Keryn said...

I really loved attending BYU. What exciting and happy news! I met three of my best friends in the whole world at BYU--two of them on the first day of freshman year. Congrats!

Stephen said...

Thanks for the pro-BYU comments.

Sorry that part of the post got edited out, but she is very happy to be going.

annegb said...

Your post made me laugh, Stephen. I hope my son-in-law loves Sarah that much.

Bookslinger said...

"... the emotion that was hiding the most was how happy I am with the people in my life, especially my wife and children."

Stephen:
That confirms something that I've suspected of bereaved parents. They are afraid or ashamed of being happy, for any reason, after the loss of a child.

From what I've read, men seem to go through the grieving process faster than women, and that is something that leads to the breakup of most marriages of people who lose a child.

"I knew that by using food to submerge and deal with emotion that I was hiding emotion, and that when I quit 'eating my feelings' that emotions would emerge, and they have."

You've also learned something that most bariatric (stomach surgery) patients learn the hard way. Bariatric surgery forces people, almost like a gun to their head, to deal with the emotional reasons why they overate.

The surgery itself doesn't, and can't, cure the underlying emotional reasons. The patient still has to deal with those issues or else they will revert back and blow out their stomachs. (Newer style surgeries reduce that risk, but make the consequences of overeating hellish nonetheless.)

Ariel said...

That is the sweetest, most romantic thing I've heard all week.

I'm glad you're happy.

Stephen said...

You've also learned something that most bariatric (stomach surgery) patients learn the hard way. Bariatric surgery forces people, almost like a gun to their head, to deal with the emotional reasons why they overate.

The surgery itself doesn't, and can't, cure the underlying emotional reasons. The patient still has to deal with those issues or else they will revert back and blow out their stomachs. (Newer style surgeries reduce that risk, but make the consequences of overeating hellish nonetheless.)


Average bariatric surgery weight loss lasts seven years, start to finish. That is the scary thing about it.

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annegb -- glad I made you smile, and I hope your son-in-law loves Sarah that much too.

Stephen said...

BTW

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Current Rank: #4925 Current Status: Flappy Bird
Link Count: 59 Link Score: 40
Average Daily Visits: 107

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Of course that probably won't last. I need four more links to make it more or less stable, but it was neat to see. The revamping of the ecosystem meant that I pretty much quit tracking it for a while, but I thought I'd take a peak this morning.